Holiday Obsessing

Usually I can wait until at least mid-November before I start obsessing over the holidays. Not this year. This year I started mid-September, around the time my oldest started school. I don't know why... Perhaps it has something to do with the two doting sets of grandparents wanting to fawn over the only grandchildren they may ever know. Perhaps it is the thought of packing and traveling with three small children that sends shivers up my spine. Perhaps it is the fact that with my husband's already busy travel schedule, I worry that we won't have any time - just the five of us - to celebrate anything.

Some families thrive and enjoy large get-togethers for the holidays: singing around the piano, sipping hot toddies, telling family stories and looking at old pictures late into the night. That's how I grew up - my mom had seven siblings, and I had quite a few cousins. My dad had two brothers - and I had cousins on that side as well. Until I was about ten, we'd stay home for maybe one holiday every two or three years. As I've grown, I've wanted to spend more time at 'home'. The problem now is home is not my parents. It's the place my husband and I reside. I look forward to the day that people visit us. Yes, I know that may require me to cook, but I like cooking. What I'd really like is to wake up, in my own bed, and spend the day with my kids and spouse. Visitors are fine, but after nine years of marriage and five (almost six) years of parenthood, I've hosted exactly one holiday. It was the Christmas I was too pregnant to travel; my in-laws came up for the day. I'm growing weary of picking up and hauling my kids around on the holidays.

I've already told my husband that I'm trying to get the holidays planned. If I know what we're doing, I'm much less likely to be stressed out.

Ha.

Now I have to figure out what the kids 'want' from their grandparents.

Happy Halloween!

True Love

True love is my husband going out at 9 pm to pick me up something to eat.

Love KFC Mashed Taters and Gravy.

Mmmmm.

Mom's Night Out

I'm wiped out.

Yesterday I watched two of my friend's four kids from 8:30 am until 2:45. That gave me a 3 year old (mine), 2 year old (hers), 1 year old (mine), and 10 month old (hers). It went really well. Much better than I expected, but still wore me out.

My mom came that evening and watched the kids so I could have dinner out with "the girls." We had a great time. I had two huge margaritas - I wasn't the only one. I couldn't get to sleep until around 1 am. One of the problems I have with my husband gone - I just don't sleep very well. Today I hosted playgroup. Because some of the moms wanted to attend the Halloween party at preschool, that left us with 3 adults and 9 kids three and under. Of course we offered... Holy buckets it was busy.

After everyone left, I put my baby down for a nap. Turned on "Go, Diego, Go!" and let the boy watch cartoons while I took a cat-nap.

I will go to bed early tonight. I will go to bed early tonight. I will go to bed early tonight.

I love this picture of my husband

Lake Tahoe. Vacation with my husband and no kids. I'd go back in a heartbeat - only I'd take the kids. Maybe a nanny too. Or my parents.

Throw together chicken casserole

Went to the in-laws this weekend. Came home to hungries and a mostly empty fridge. Created this out of desperation:

Throw Together Chicken Casserole
1/2 pkg egg noodles
1 can cream of chicken soup
1/2 can milk
1 can chicken - drained
1/2 cup shredded cheddar cheese
1/2 sleeve crackers - crushed
1 T butter

Cook noodles according to package directions. Whisk together soup and milk, stir in chicken and warm. When noodles are done, mix with soup and cheese, pour into a baking dish. Melt butter and mix with crushed crackers, pour over top. Bake 400 for 15 minutes, just enough to warm through and brown crackers.

Serve with fried apples and can of green beans.

It's been a long week

It's been a long week. My husband left Monday morning at 5:30, bound for Chicago. He's supposed to be arriving any minute home. For those of you keeping track, today's Friday. That means I've spent the better part of the day scurrying around, trying to get the house in some sort of order.

I know it's silly, but I like to think about what I might write. If something good comes up and the timing is right, I do. If not, I may scribble down a title and couple of rough ideas. Before I forget, here are the ideas I came up with today:

At what point does it become nagging?
Diligent with #2's school work as with #1's.
Two kinds of people, Coke and Pepsi.
Plating dinner = Eaten off the counter. Have to keep it clean.
Pants optional - day in the life of a three year old.
Outgrowing the "sling"
Very own crazy town parade.

Hopefully in the future, I'll take the time to post about these. If not - that's what's happened so far, and it's not yet 2:00 pm.

Trailblazer

I just got done pushing a Chevy Trailblazer out of traffic.

During morning drop off a school, it's rather busy. A woman's car gave out at the stop sign, right before the turn. A hundred more feet, and she would have been in the parking lot. Instead, her flashers were on in an already tight spot. I dropped the girl off, not wanting her to be late, then parked the car where I could keep an eye on the kids. Cracked the windows and turned off the engine. It's currently in the low 50's so I wasn't worried about them getting too hot or cold.

Walked over and told her to put it in neutral. And I started to push. After about 50 feet, a couple of guys hopped out of their cars and started helping. Thank goodness. There was a slight incline to get into the lot, and quite frankly, I probably couldn't have made it alone.

Now she's safely out of the way, waiting for a tow.

I freaking told you.

Don't call me in a snit, wondering where your birth certificate is. I don't know. You're in Chicago. Your flight leaves at 5:05 - Today. You knew a month ago that you would be traveling outside the US. I even sent you this e-mail:

"Make certain that you can return to the United States with the proof of citizenship that you take with you. Although some countries may allow you to enter with only a birth certificate, U.S. law requires that you document both your U.S. citizenship and identity when you re-enter the United States. The best document to prove your U.S. citizenship is a valid U.S. passport. Other documents that establish U.S. citizenship include an expired U.S. passport, a certified copy of your birth certificate, a Certificate of Naturalization, a Certificate of Citizenship or a Report of Birth Abroad of a U.S. citizen. To prove your identity, either a valid driver's license or a government identification card that includes a photo or physical description is acceptable."

From: http://abcnews.go.com/Travel/FlyingHigh/story?id=680167&page=1

So it looks like you need both a certified copy of your birth certificate and a driver's license."

Don't tell me how you'll have to "take your lumps" on this one. I told you. I told you. I told you.

Don't call me from Chicago, telling me you may not go. I told you. I told you. I TOLD YOU!

Tuesday

Tuesday is probably my favorite day of the week.

Tuesday (and Thursday) my boy goes to preschool for two hours and fifteen minutes. In that time I get to grocery shop with only one little helper. One that does not beg or nag. One that sits politely in the cart, just pleased to be in my company. I can take a minute and look at something - like the prices - with being assulted with the 'gimmies.'

For groceries, I prefer SuperTarget. Though slightly more expensive than SuperWalMart, I just like it better. I walk in today, and notice again the people in the Pizza Hut dining area. Our SuperTarget has a small Pizza Hut in the store. They serve a limitied menu, but the breadsticks are pretty dang good.

The place is full. Full of folks drinking coffee and talking. Trying to remember the last time I had a drink and a meaingful conversation. Heck, any conversation. Most of these people are, um, old. The handicapped stalls are all full of Lincolns and other large sedans.

I don't know if they meet every day, but I do know they meet on Tuesday. They all have a cup of coffee, some a donut too. It's nice to see them. Nice to see there is life after kids.

I wonder what they talk about. I know they type. They get the paper every day and read it. I glance at the front page, page two, and the front page of the Life section. That's about it. All the time I have. They take the time to read the paper and maybe even talk about it. That's what my grandparents did. Read the paper in the morning, front to back.

Maybe they talk about their kids and grandkids, and for some, I suspect, great-grandkids. Share pictures and talk. Talk about the kids that visit, and the kids that don't. The kids across town and the kids across the world.

The weather. I'm most certain they talk about the weather and the crops. Here in the midwest, they devote news time to the state of the crops. Corn, soybeans... animals too hogs, cattle. I'm sure a few were farmers in their day. These are the folks that take a drive, just to look at the fields.

There's something comforting about it. Seeing them talk. Look forward to seeing them next Tuesday, even if they don't see me.

"I don't give a shit"

Yes, that's what I just told my kids.

The house was mostly quiet (except for Lazy Town) and I thought I might have a minute or two to check e-mail. No more than thirty seconds go by and I hear it. The after school squabbling has started. They only have to make it to 4:15 when we go to the gym. Not today.

"I was here first"
"AAAAA!!!!"
"Moooommmm! I was here first"
More screaming.

They were fighting over who sits on one certain end of the couch. Best TV viewing I suppose. Rather than the peaceful few minutes alone, I stop in there 0nly to be assulted with "I was here" by both of them.

Told them I didn't give a shit and sent them to their rooms. I realize that it can be important, where you sit on the couch. I realize that the boy has no right to push his way into the spot. I just don't want to hear it today.

Fourteen minutes until we leave for the Y.

Love the Blog!

Does it really work - to spam on blogs?

For the record - I don't need to refinance anything, I don't want to make money in a pyramid scheme - oops, multilevel marketing opportunity, and I'm not looking to buy anything.

I've shared this blog with a few friends - I don't mind if others read it or it's passed to someone else. I really enjoy the feedback that is true and genuine.

I do mind being spammed.

33 minutes 49 seconds

Thirty three minutes forty nine seconds is how long it takes me to run 3.1 miles. I did much, much better than I thought I could. Not too sore either.

This is the best 5k I've done to date. My new night before routine - split a pitcher of margaritas with my husband and get to bed way to late.

The funny thing about running - every second counts to the finish. Doesn't matter if it's a sub 20 minute, or trying to keep in under 35 - every second counts.

Economics

Went to dinner with the family tonight - our favorite Mexican place. Though the don't know our name like "Cheers" the service is friendly, the food is good, and the kids love the chips.

As we were driving there, I mentioned I may need a Margarita. It had been a long week - my husband left Sunday afternoon and I picked him up at the airport Friday night at 11pm. My Mother-in-Law had visited. I signed up for a 5k with my Dad on Sunday.

Noticed on the specials board they had a pitcher of Margaritas for $9.99. Mentioned it to my husband. Looked on the menu - regularly $4.25 for a 16 oz. So really, it was much more economical for us to buy the pitcher even if we didn't drink it all.

Though that goes against my grain - it kills me every week when I clean out the fridge and throw out food - discarding alcohol is worse.

Had our dinner and put a rather large dent in the pitcher. They were really good. Really. Had some left, planning to just leave it, knowing we still got a great deal. Kids did really well with their meals - even finished all their drink - in a styrofoam cup with lid and straw.

The remains of the pitcher are on my counter. I don't know how much more I can take. After all, tomorrow I'm running a 5k with my dad at 9:00 am.

Until then, though, I'm in Margaritaville...

A New Number

Stepped on the scale this morning and saw and number I haven't seen since High School.

185.

25 down, 10 to go.

She came bearing pants.

My mother-in-law arrived about two hours ago. I can't complain. For the last two hours she's played with my kids.

It is amazing what I can get done when there aren't any little people at my feet.

She's here until Saturday. My husband arrives late late late Friday. Until then, it's her, me and my three. Should be interesting.

She did bring me pants. "I couldn't resist... They're talls, and were half price..."

Love a deal.

Facing My Fear

For anyone that knows me - they won't believe this.

People scare me. Especially guys.

I have a hard time looking people in the eye when I talk to them. This is purely my own insecurity. I've gotten really good at bluffing my way through social situations, but in reality I'm so tightly wound it's hard for people to see the real me.

Today I faced one of my fears.

I've been working out at the local YMCA for almost a year. In the last three or four months, I've really picked up the pace. Lifting more weight, running faster and farther, and getting on the elliptical for longer periods of time at a higher resistance. I've been doing the 'machine' weight versus the free weight.

The cardio equipment and the machine weights are easily accessable, and don't really intimidate me. I'm comfortable with it. The free weights are found in a different room. There are a lot of guys in there. There are mirrors in there. And there are two pieces of equipment that I have desperately wanted to use. What kept me out? Fear.

Today I did it. I did what I wanted to do and scurried out. It helps that there were only four guys in the room. I don't even think they noticed I was in there. But I did. As I was leaving, I caught a glimpse of myself in the mirror. I really liked what I saw.

Can't wait for Friday's workout.

Screamer

The Baby has taken to screaming. When she's hungry, thirsty, tired, wants a toy, wants 'up', wants 'down', or just feels like it.

It is draining the life out of me.

Today after getting home from Faith and Friendship at church it started again. Thought she might be hungy. After wolfing down a Nutrigrain bar, she started screaming again. Tried another, but she pushed it away. Gave her milk. Drank half of it, pushed it on the floor, and started screaming. Let her down to play. She just grabbed my leg and, you guessed it, screamed.

Took her upstairs, screaming the whole way. Bucking too. Headbutting - but I know she's not trying to do it, that's just part of the screaming. Her molars are coming in nicely.

Started rocking her. Holding her firmly enough she wouldn't hurt herself - or me. Rocked and rocked. Looked to see her screaming with her eyes closed. Made the mistake of shifting my weight so my leg wouldn't fall asleep. Mistake. Now she sounds like Looney Tunes Tasmanian Devil.

Rocked. And rocked. And rocked.

The screaming subsided. Her head fell and snuggled to my neck. Started getting sweaty. Both of us. Rocked a few minutes more.

Laid her in her crib. Sleep baby. Please. Just sleep.

And she did. For an hour and fifteen minutes. And woke up a whole new child.

I can do this.

Chili

It's that time of year - Thursday I ran to the basement before carting my daughter to school. Needed hat and mittens. Found them in the appropriate box (for once).

Decided to make chili for dinner. The nice thing about this is it can be thrown in the crockpot in the morning or tended to on the stove.

Chili
1 pound ground beef
1 small onion - chopped
2 cans diced tomatoes
1 can chili beans
1 can black beans - drained and rinsed
1 can kidney beans - drained and rinsed
chili powder
ground cumin
hot sauce
1 can tomato paste

Brown ground beef with onion. Add tomatoes, beans and seasoning to taste. Whisk tomato paste with two cans water before adding. Simmer awhile. Serve with cornbread or fritos. I have shredded cheddar cheese, sliced green onion and sour cream as add-ins.

Love chili on a cold day.

A year ago today.

A year ago today I handed my resignation to my boss.

I've been home 'officially' for a year.

I thought I'd have stronger feelings about it.

Purple and Green and Orange Oh My!

Please excuse the mess.

I've been playing in the Template HTML this afternoon.

I am by no means an expert and it shows.

That and I'm trying to do it with a baby crawling all over me.

I did both!

Last night I went to the bookstore and found an appropriate book and card.

http://www.gazellebookservices.co.uk/ISBN/0824965205.htm

Then I went home, found everyone ok and proceed to do a - get this - 8 1/2 minute mile!

WHOO HOO! I haven't done that since college. Knowing I was doing only one lap, I tried to go a little faster than usual. I'm so excited!

Back to your regularly scheduled lives...

Tonight

My parents are coming to visit tonight! Yea!

They have decided to put me on the docket for weekly visits, either Tuesday or Wednesday - depending on both my mom's and my schedules. With my husband out of town most of the week this will be WONDERFUL!

Now. What to do tonight.

I want to go and find a gift for the first anniversary of our godchild's baptism.

I need to go work out.

Maybe both. Nothing like going to the "Christian Store" hot and sweat. But I won't have kids with me.

It's not a winter coat, but...

Made this for the little girl mentioned in yesterday's post.

I hope she likes it. It looked really cute on my son (he's a 4T and I needed to make sure it would fit over her head - if it will fit over his head, it should be ok).

Found 4 pair of shoes - two sized 10, and two sized 11. Also a pair of slippers.

Found quite a few things that should work for her. Just need to get them boxed up so my friend can pick them up this afternoon.

My friend down the street added a few things as well - clothes, a notepad, coloring book and crayons. Put the paper and crayons in my daughter's old back pack along with scissors, tape, glue sticks and construction paper.

Went to Target today and found t-shirts, socks and underwear for the dad. I included the gift receipt if it isn't the right size. Strange picking out underwear for another man. Somehow I think my husband will understand. I did find two pair of pants in my husband's donate pile that might fit him. Also picked up toothbrushes, some hair bands, new jammies for the girl, and fruit snacks.

Feeling better about this today. I had a really hard time getting to sleep last night. Images of my husband and daughter sleeping at rest stops haunted me.

Hurry up and go to sleep, Baby.

I have things to do today.

Important things.

Went to Faith and Friendship at church this morning. Had the discussion, with a couple of "a-ha" moments, a few laughs and a couple tears. During Circle Round, though, one of the women started talking about her Sunday trip to McDonald's. She and her family go to McD's for breakfast after church. Mom and Dad read the paper and the kids play at the play place. A man asked her husband directions to Minnesota. It's really not that hard - I-35 North. It bugged her though. She started talking to him. And can she talk. Turns out he's a survivor from Katrina. He and his four year old daughter. They've been living in their car, driving North in hopes of finding their family. He thinks some of them went to Minnesota.

In this day in age, how can you not know where your family is? Well. No cell phones and not much internet usage, that's how. Families scattered. I know that if I can't get my husband on his phone, I can e-mail him. Same for my Mom, Dad, and sister. She offered him a phone card. He declined, saying he didn't have anyone to call.

She talked to him more. He's from Mississippi, but had gone to New Orleans to take care of his dying mother. She passed a week before the hurricane. He'd left his drug addicted wife in Mississippi and took their daughter. The storm came and they went to Texas. Heard some of his family was in Minnesota and he started heading North. Looking for places to stay, sleeping in the car.

Ran into my friend at McDonalds. She and her family took them home. Washed their clothes. He slept for five hours while the kids played. As much as she wanted to take them it, this day in age, it's just too hard. Even with all the identification he had - FEMA stuff, Red Cross stuff, a driver's license with an address that no longer exists - it was just more than she could do. While he slept, she found a shelter for them. A good one, one for families. He sounds like he's just needing a place to stay. To get his bearings. Maybe even settle down here. "People are nice here," he told her.

Instead, she's looking for clothes for them. The girl doesn't have shoes. So Baby, you need to go sleep so I can look for 4T clothes and size 10 or 11 shoes. While you nap, I'll go through Daddy's stuff and see if anything will fit him, too.

Happy Birthday Dad!

Saturday my dad turned the big six-oh. Such a strange thing , to know that his life is more than half over. To commemorate it, my sister and I came up with the following list and had it framed:

Sixty Great Things About Our Dad
1. He is an adventurer and a big kid at heart.
2. He climbed a tree to make a swing when the ladder wasn’t tall enough.
3. He pushed us high, high, high on the swing.
4. Countless games of “chase” first with us
5. Now with his grandkids.
6. He brought Rusty home – without asking.
7. He brought Funny Face home with the washer and dryer.
8. The invention and play of “Hot Lava”
9. The “Midnight Feeding Frenzy”
10. Taught us how to drive.
11. Bought our first car, and our second
12. Supported us through college.
13. And ‘gave’ us away.
14. Driving countless times to Omaha with Gretchen.
15. Using all his vacation to go to Paris with his girls.
16. Took us camping.
17. Taught us how to build a fire.
18. Taught us how to grill a great steak.
19. Let us use gas when we were out of lighter fluid.
20. Let us throw matches at it.
21. Took Danielle to Adventureland when Mom and Gretchen were away.
22. Went to countless High School events to support his girls.
23. Ran with Gretchen many times to school for cross country training.
24. Took Danielle out of school to play golf.
25. Took Danielle out of school to roof the screened in porch.
26. He has a garage full of tools.
27. He knows how to use them.
28. He is always willing to help us with projects around our homes.
29. For help laying & refinishing hardwood floors.
30. And grouting tile.
31. The beautiful walnut chests he built for each of us – no nails involved.
32. He runs for fun & the four marathons he’s run.
33. Loves a good rare steak.
34. And finishing off the last of the ice cream so we wouldn’t have to.
35. Is always concerned for us.
36. Never lets us leave with out saying “Drive safe”
37. And, “Call us when you get home”
38. And, “Let me check the oil”
39. And the $20 for gas. Many times.
40. And the “I love you”
41. Not afraid to try something new – like the Alligator hunt.
42. Let Danielle practice cutting hair on him.
43. Until she got it right.
44. Let Danielle take him for his first tattoo.
45. Shares his kill – the buffalo and deer are great.
46. Loves a bowl of sugared popcorn.
47. Waving at the door with Mom.
48. For picking up the check out for dinner many times.
49. For helping Danielle hunt and clean her first pheasant.
50. For helping Danielle hunt and clean her first deer.
51. Likes to see how fast the car will go, and lets his girls try also.
52. For many seasons of morel mushroom hunting.
53. And scouting them out to let us find some.
54. Countless canoe trips.
55. Hunting with us for artifacts – pottery, horse bones & arrowheads.
56. For finding the ring he lost on Danielle’s birthday – the one Mom gave him when she was born.
57. For showing us what unconditional love is all about.
58. For marrying and loving our mother all these years.
59. For giving us a role model for which to measure the men in our lives by.
60. Being the greatest Dad we could have asked for.

This is just a short list of the things we love you for.

All our love,
Gretchen and Danielle