Tuesday, January 27, 2009

When life gives you tart cherries...

Make a pie. Right?

Sometimes, though you just need to sit in the corner and cry.

The last several days have been fraught with emotion.

First and foremost, my kids don't need me like they used to.

Sure, they still need me, but it's not so relentless now. Now, I can find a moment (or two) to do something I want to do. But I tell you, it's hard. It's hard to let go.

Second, the thought of moving terrifies me.

Leaving everything I've grown to love, again. Finding a new house, packing, moving the kids from their friends and activities... Starting over. It's driven me to tears and sleepless nights. Yes, when it happens I'll be Mary-Sunshine to the kids and will be positive about it, but right now, right now I'm having plenty of sullen moments over it all.

One of the biggest things though? My weight. Again.

To say I've been stress eating is an understatement. Back in November I had a very interesting offer from Sensa. I pretty much took the month of December and half of January off. I'm going to give it another go, though. Between that and attempting regular trips to the gym, I'm hoping to see a few pounds slide off the scale.

Finally, I have been struggling with a lack of purpose. Sure, I take care of my kids (and theoretically the house), but it really isn't enough. The very nearly completed Baby Clothes Quilt filled up a part of me. It was terribly fun to do something for someone else - I showed her the quilt and she loves it.

Today I went to the fabric store and got talking with the owner. She's looking for someone to sew samples. Guess what I walked out with?

Lordy. What have I gotten myself into? I'm really looking forward to putting it together.



I guess what I'm trying to say is I finally feel like I have a grip again. Funny how a jelly roll of fabric can do that.

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Also, I'm looking for some blog-site help. I'd like a bit of an update and a few modifications. If you know someone, or are someone, that would like to help please let me know. I wouldn't be able to pay you, but I could make you a really pretty quilt.

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8 comments:

The Quilt Buddy said...

Hi Gretchen!

I have the same feelings sometimes! My little person is only 2 and he doesn't "need me" as much as he did last year.

Next I know about moving! My husband is in the military and we move every 2-3 years. It sucks and it takes me awhile to find my way, but then everything is fine. In fact we will be moving for our last time at the end of Feb (3 weeks from now).

But I LOVE your retail therapy! IT always makes me feel better! What jelly roll did you get? What pattern are you making? It looks great and I might have to break down and buy that one!

The Quilt Buddy said...

Hi Gretchen!

I have the same feelings sometimes! My little person is only 2 and he doesn't "need me" as much as he did last year.

Next I know about moving! My husband is in the military and we move every 2-3 years. It sucks and it takes me awhile to find my way, but then everything is fine. In fact we will be moving for our last time at the end of Feb (3 weeks from now).

But I LOVE your retail therapy! IT always makes me feel better! What jelly roll did you get? What pattern are you making? It looks great and I might have to break down and buy that one!

The Quilt Buddy said...

Hi Gretchen!

I have the same feelings sometimes! My little person is only 2 and he doesn't "need me" as much as he did last year.

Next I know about moving! My husband is in the military and we move every 2-3 years. It sucks and it takes me awhile to find my way, but then everything is fine. In fact we will be moving for our last time at the end of Feb (3 weeks from now).

But I LOVE your retail therapy! IT always makes me feel better! What jelly roll did you get? What pattern are you making? It looks great and I might have to break down and buy that one!

Tree said...

Oh, Gretchen, I just *wish* I was there!! We would so be hanging out (running?) and then hanging out some more (wine?) and talking, talking, talking. Our kids would click instantly.

I think you have found your calling - the quilting and fabrics.

You were the first person who ever taught me about felting wool and now I have read a little more about it! See, you are always enlightening.

Mayberrys said...

I completely sympathize with most points.....really everything except the sewing parts :)

Sending you huge hugs!!!

You know, the real estate market is dirt cheap in FL right now - perhaps a home by the beach? And we do have fabric stores here....no ice hockey, but soccer and football are fun....it's 77 today...

Cathy said...

Glad you have found your "thing"...I think it's hard for creative people to not be doing what they love and what stimulates their brains!

p.s. I'm no computer whiz, but I may be able to help you, depending on what you need...no payment or quilt required (i'm on the other side of the world)!

Jems said...

I know how you feel about the independence of the children - we so want them to grow and help themselves, then when they do we want to snatch them back again. My eldest needs me less and less and I crave the days he wants a hug - I hold him just a bit longer than I should :-)

The quilting you do is beautiful - maybe you could work a theme around the life you've had there and work that into a piece.

Gretchen said...

I can help a bit with the blog thing! As long as its not too complicated :) But I have done my own wordpress blog and my two on blogspot. Just e-mail me and let's chat about what you are looking for! From one Gretchen to another, because we have to stick together, right?!